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Santa-Banta Funny Jokes Collection

Santa Singh : ‘Look Banta, what

Santa Singh : ‘Look Banta, what type of glasses they have made. The top is closed. How can you fill lassi in it ?’
Banta Singh : ‘Yes, that’s funny. And even if you make a hole at the top, how will the lassi stay in the glass when the bottom is open?’

While visiting Santa’s house

While visiting Santa’s house, Banta noticed that he had replaced his usual TV with a smaller model.
Thinking that perhaps the larger set has broken down, Banta asked why the small one was there.
“Oh,” Santa replied, “I have decided to watch less T.V.”

Seeing Santa Singh depressed one of his friends asks him

Seeing Santa Singh depressed one of his friends asks him.
“Oye why are you sad?”
To which Santa replies …“I lost Rs 300 in bet.”
His friend ask hims…“How?”
Santa Singh says..“I bet on India for Rs 200…”But unfortunately India lost
His friend queries..“But you said Rs 300…”
Santa Singh answers…“I again bet for India for Rs 100 in the highlights of the match”

Santa meets his friend Banta

Santa meets his friend Banta
Santa : A & B, A & B, A & B, A & B, A & B…!

Banta : Oye, Iska Matlab ?
Santa : Kuch Nahin Yaar, I Mean Long Time No C..!

Banta wants to celebrate his wife’s birthday

Banta wants to celebrate his wife’s birthday by throwing a party. So he goes to order a birthday cake.
The salesman asks him what message he wants to put on the cake.
Well he thinks for a while and says:
Let’s put, “you are not getting older you are getting better”.
The salesman asks, “How do you want me to put it?”
Sardar says, Well put “You are not getting older”, at the top and You are getting better” at the bottom.
The real fun didn’t start until the cake was opened the entire party watched the message decorated on the cake:
“You are not getting older at the top, you are getting better at the bottom”.

Santa: Why didn’t you marry

Santa: Why didn’t you marry?
Banta: I was searching for an ideal match.
Santa: So, you didn’t find an ideal girl?
Banta: I found one.
Santa: Then?
Banta: She was also searching for an ideal match.

Phone ki ganti baji

Phone ki ganti baji.
Santa : Phone mere liye ho toh kehna mein ghar pe nahi hoon.
Jasmeet : Wo ghar pe hain.

Santa : Maine mana kiya tha ke…
Jasmeet : Phone mere liye tha!

Once a Hindu, a Muslim and our dear Santa

Once a Hindu, a Muslim and our dear Santa were standing together. An Englishman came up and asked, “hey guys, what is your favorite flowers?”
The Hindu replied, ‘Lotus’
‘Ha, I clean my shit with that!’ the Englishman jeered

The Hindu got angry, the lotus being our national flower
The Muslim replied : “Chameli”
‘Ha I clean my shit with that!’ The Englishman response

The Muslim also got angry but kept quite
The Englishman asked Santa, ‘Sardarji, and what is your favourite flower?’
Patriotic Santa replied: ‘Cactus! and replied, “now clean your ass with that!”

Banta : Wo ladki deaf lagti hai

Banta : Wo ladki deaf lagti hai. Main kuch kehta hoon, woh kuch aur hi bolti hai.
Santa : Kaise?
Banta : Maine kaha I Luv U, To woh boli “Maine kal hi naye sandal kharide hain”.

Ek sardar subah subah jogging karne

Ek sardar subah subah jogging karne ke liye nikla apne kutte ke sath.
Rudra: Oye yeh subah subah gadhe ke saath kaha jaa rahe ho?
Sardar: Oye yeh gadha nahi kutta hai.
Rudra: Oye main kutte se hi pochh raha hoon.

Santa Singh : ‘Look Banta

Santa Singh : ‘Look Banta, what type of glasses they have made. The top is closed. How can you fill lassi in it ?’
Banta Singh : ‘Yes, that’s funny. And even if you make a hole at the top, how will the lassi stay in the glass when the bottom is open?’

Santa and Banta are riding

Santa and Banta are riding through the desert on their horses. As they ride along, Banta smells something horrible. He stops his horse and turns around.
He says, “Hey, you shit your pants?”
Santa says, “No.”
He believes him and they keep riding. As they go on, the smell gets worse. The smell is so bad, flys begin to swarm. Banta stops his horse and turns around.
He then says, “Are you sure you did not shit your pants?”
Santa says, “Yes, I am sure.”
They keep going and now the smell is getting to be unbearable. Banta stops his horse and gets off his horse.
He then says, “Get of your horse. Pull down your pants. I thought you said you did not shit your pants?”
Santa replies, “I thought you meant today!”

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